The issue with depending on things happening is shit may never happen. My hair may never grow. I may never get a man. I may never like my big toe. I may never get over how my father/mother/aunt/colonel Sanders was never there. Despite the hold for these happenstances, life still goes on, and so we must choose to have inner peace, joy, and security within ourselves.
Us, young fly free millennial Black folk see a need for healing in a way our parents and grand parents may not understand. The way I see it; in addition to being the products of triumphant, resilient, ambitions, hard-working, out-going, intelligent, and gorgeous brown people, we are also the products of generations of negative mental, physical, and sometimes spiritual abuse and habits that must be broken for the sake of posterity. I recognize the cyclical nature in my own family, and I intend to create a new ebb and flow. And, I will do so, even if it means going against the grain and seeking therapeutic counseling. The church is just not enough for me any more.
I work my butt off 24/7, and I have not secured any bags [yet]. In this season of my life I have learned how to downward dog and forward fold a dollar so far, my bills have become more limber than my own self. My wardrobe is limited. Roasted Chicken Ramon Noodles is a new favorite. Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches are an art form. Any time I get a meal, I don't dare think about disrespecting God--s/he gone get this praise, and I'll look at your funny if you dare sit across from me and don't give the Lord the glory because meals are hard to come by witcho rude ass. I was so grateful when my Momma blessed me with some work shoes for Christmas, you would have thought I was 12. If you ask me out, I'm going to consult my gas tank first, then I'll hit you back. Yet and still, I consider myself fine af, fly af, and still making boss moves. The secret is: I work with what I got.
Sometimes you have to pull back layers to get to the core un-bandage the wound to treat the sore strengthen those wings, so you can soar dive deeply so you can touch the ocean's floor quiet yourself, so you can listen sit still, so you can read breathe in, so you can receive take a … Continue reading On learning to control the fire
I thought I had jumped over the lack of motivation hurdle until fatigue, napping, poor eating habits, confusion, and negativity blew the whistle during my race. Then, I realized, I was off my game because I had not been adhering to a spiritual practice.